Beyond the Fourth Trimester: Why I Became a Mother’s Helper
As a postpartum doula, my work has always been about meeting mothers where they are—tired, healing, stretched, becoming. But the truth is, the need doesn’t stop after the newborn phase. It evolves, like we do.
Stop ‘nesting’. Build a nest instead.
As pregnancy progresses, many mothers experience an overwhelming urge to prepare for baby’s arrival. But the real value of nesting is not a perfectly organised nursery or spotless house…
Men are from Mars and other myths that keep mothers depressed, depleted and burnt out.
Have you heard that women have a natural ‘maternal instinct’? It’s a widely held belief that seems true. But let’s set the record straight—caring for children isn’t some magical, inborn skill. It’s learned. And guess what? Men can learn it too.
Mothers’ needs are babies’ needs are children’s needs are mother’s needs.
Amidst these major shifts, there were countless whispers, “I need a break from being a mum for a minute.” Yet, I also vividly recall the opposite feelings from the early days - watching people hold my newborns while feeling a visceral ache for them to be returned to me.
Motherhood is all Middles
Babies don’t ‘learn to sleep through’ and then never wake another night in their lives. The washing isn’t brought in from the line, folded, and packed away never to be moved again. Life isn't linear.
Something’s gotta give: when doing it all is impossible.
If all you saw was the colour-coordinated outfit and the homemade banana bread you might ask “how do you manage it all?” but we only see the manicured front lawn of others’ lives while we know all the mouldy crevices of our own.