You’ll go into debt for a new car, but not for postpartum.
When my friends started having babies, almost every single one of them upgraded their car.
And I get it. I really do. You need the space. You want the safety features. So they traded up. Financed it. Added a few hundred dollars a month to the household bills with hardly a second thought. And nobody (except perhaps me!) said, "Are you sure you really need that?"
I've been thinking about it more and more lately.
Because I provide postpartum care, so I know what a genuinely supported postpartum can cost. If you don't have family nearby. If you don't have a built-in village. If you're going to need to pay for the help that once came for free; a postpartum doula, lactation consultant, pelvic floor physio, proper nourishing meals you didn't have to cook, a baby chiro after a tricky birth. If you factor it all in, the figure is in the thousands.
And yet, if I suggested to most people that they take out a personal loan for their postpartum, they'd think I'd lost the plot.
Same debt. Completely different reaction.
And this is not logical; it’s cultural.
‘Normal’ is just what the people around us do.
The thing about cultural norms is that they feel like facts. They feel like common sense. Like, obviously you'd upgrade the car. Obviously, that's a reasonable thing to prioritise.
But it's not obvious. It's just common and ‘acceptable.’
Nobody sat down and decided that a new car was more important than a mother's recovery. In fact, nobody decided that a mother’s recovery was unimportant. It’s a side effect of the systems we live within, the culture, economic pressures - all that malarkey. And because these things are so entrenched, we don't question them. We budget for what we’re used to - weddings, cars, gym memberships, overseas holidays. We even finance them, and on we go.
Postpartum support hasn't had that moment yet. It's not common enough to feel normal. So when someone brings it up, it sounds like an indulgence. A nice idea for people with money to spare.
That mindset is shifting, albeit slowly, because of the families who are choosing differently.
This isn't about choosing between a car and a doula
When I make this analogy, people argue, "Okay, but I actually do need a bigger car."
Sure. But that's not the point.
The point is to notice the double standard. To sit with the fact that some things feel completely reasonable and others feel like a stretch. And to get curious about where that feeling is coming from.
Because it's not coming from logic. A bigger car is more comfortable…. postpartum support can change the trajectory of how you heal, how you feed your baby, how you feel about yourself a year down the track, how your relationship holds up in that sometimes brutal first year.
Every investment is an act of advocacy
And this isn’t just about us.
Every mother who invests in her postpartum is doing something bigger than helping herself.
She's making it visible. She's making it normal. She's moving it one step closer to being expected, to being planned for, to being something that eventually gets built into the systems that are supposed to support all of us.
We're probably a generation away from postpartum care being a standard part of the healthcare conversation. That future gets built by the choices we make now.
If you're pregnant and the car conversation has already started:
Maybe add another conversation.
What will you actually need on the other side? What would it feel like to come home from the hospital and have someone in your corner? To not have to figure out feeding alone? To have your body supported from the beginning?
If I could go back in time, here’s how I’d spend my money. Well, the bank’s money! I would 100% be applying for a personal loan to cover these costs:
Postpartum Doula - $3000-$5000
Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) - 3 visits $500-$1000
Womens’s Health Physiotherapist - 3-5 visits $600-$1000
Meal Delivery - $500-$1200
Baby chiropractor (if needed) - $200-$400
Mother’s Helper (weekly x 12 weeks) - $2160
Mental Health Support/Counselling - 4 visits $400-$600
Total - $7,360 - $11,360
YES, this is what I would set aside for my fourth trimester if I could do it all over again!
Because I wish money was not a roadblock between me and breastfeeding support, but it was! I wish I didn’t need to forego my sanity (quite literally, at some points) because paying for counselling or specialist support didn’t seem like a viable option.
This isn't an exhaustive list. And it's not a prescription. But it is a starting point for having the conversation before the baby arrives, not after, when you're exhausted and reactive and just trying to get through the week. And you don’t have to budget for all of it, but you do have to decide that you matter during this short, but hugely important season; that your recovery is worth planning for.
The Postpartum Blueprint
If $7,000 still seems unthinkable, but you want a plan that has you cared for in the fourth trimester, then The Postpartum Blueprint is for you.
Over 8 weeks online with me, you’ll learn how to build your village and activate it to show up for you in ways that you need. You’ll gather resources and tools to overcome hurdles as they arise. And you’ll get yourself sorted before baby arrives, so that you can head into motherhood feeling confident and excited!
Early bird enrolments are open now ⬇
